Yesterday my car reached 1,000 kilometres and today is my anniversary with WordPress. I like anniversaries; they make us feel like something has happened. They create beginnings, middles and ends. They give us space within which to reflect: am I different now? Where was I last time? They allow for break-ups and reevaluations and for us to think we’re growing. They allow us to imagine that we’re always getting somewhere.
There is this campaign ad against the BC Liberals that asks Where were you 12 years ago? The point is that twelve years ago the Liberals gained power and isn’t twelve years too long? I loved the ad the first time I saw it. I came running into the room to see what it was for. I was like a kid with my hand up, wanting to share that twelve years ago I was twelve years old and now I am an ADULT! I can drive a car and I am about to be in a career and I have already kissed a boy. Then it was a campaign ad.
Time is so ephemeral that we try to tie it to ourselves. We look at time through our experiences; we look at our experiences by breaking time down into chunks. We call chunks anniversaries and milestones. We try to manipulate time so we can evaluate ourselves. It’s positive, really, that we can make something out of what we’re really just afraid of.
Yesterday and one year ago I was pretty sure I couldn’t have a blog. What would I talk about? I don’t make recipes. I have reread my diaries and you don’t want me to talk about my day. More importantly, I don’t know what’s going on in the world. I am useless. Then today one year ago I went to the North Shore Writers Festival and sat in on a panel discussion with bloggers. I got inspired, the kind of inspired I knew would probably last me until I got home but not far after. For example, after watching the document Revolution on Earth Day I gave up eating fish and seafood. Ephemeral inspiration. But today one year ago I left that panel discussion and started a blog. As I started it, I also imagined its demise. Today I still have a blog and it’s one year later. That’s really all there is to celebrate.
What made me start the blog and what has since made me keep it was a realization that I did have a vehicle for expression: I would write about writing. I would share the process of my writing with the understanding that you can talk about anything through the thing that you love. I have since talked about anything through the thing that I loved, and I think that if I read through my blog posts from one year ago to today I would see some kind of evolution. Whether that evolution be a year’s worth of positive growth or not, it would show me that time shifted, somehow, since one year today, and maybe I shifted with it.